HAPPY 18th ANNIVERSARY OF YOUR BIRTH, MY LOVE!
As you were blooming in Audra’s beautiful belly you were welcomed into the world as Ivy Katherine Green, which also became the most perfect name for your music to release for the moment or two. It’s cool to have your identity separated like that, but not in a way where you’re different people. You’re also Ally Smith, who looks like your mother Adriana too (even though you don’t have her same genetics) you grew up with all these traits that you’ve been finding and seeking and learning and growing about for 18 freaking years and you’re really becoming this beautiful human – no longer able at all to be considered an ’empty shell’, but when I listen to you patiently with no expectations I hear the ocean so cogently, as if that’s really what you are. You’re full of so much fucking magic but it’s not quite ocean magic – you definitely have gotten a lot of magic from the ocean and based a lot of your life and songs off of the ocean. It’s your favorite place, angel. But when I look at you you’re not even a shell. Not full nor empty, not really anything to do with a shell, but yet you encased yourself in a shell like a turtle, truly. That’s what was really happening.
You lifted the shell and you let me inside, and I walked in to find the place wayyyyy bigger and more complicated and beautiful than you make it look on the outside. And you said Abby, go ahead and learn about me, go ahead and learn and see. So the journey began, one of the millions of times that the journey began…and here we are, almost 3 years later, finding different things in our shells and breathing different words in our embraces. I love you, Alexandra Marie Devon Smith. Happy 18th rotation around the sun. Happy legality of buying your own cigarettes. Let’s rule this world hand in hand, babygirl.
18 Inside Jokes Representing The Times I Realized I’m Madly In Love With Allayoop
- “They’re marching for their margarine”. Now this was said by me on the first day that Ally came home from Idaho (July 1st, 2015) and she fucking laughed and I considered my life complete. – 2015
- “Armadillos”. This is what we called this health snack I got from Fred Meyer before Ally even came to Washington, and it’s a little less famous and funny than #1 but she definitely said the little snacks looked like armadillos and I laughed and secretly was thinking I wanted to keep this one. – 2015
- “Imma keep you.” Not really an inside joke, kinda a vow that she and I make every time we “cuddles” each other. She’ll be laying there and I’m like “Ally?” (I say it “awy”) “Inna cuddles? Inna cuddles.” and then I’ll cuddle into her next to me on my bed and she’ll say “Cuddles! Imma keep you. My baby.” Yes it is babytalk. I am pretty convinced that Ally and I are both secretly like 2 yet 22 at the same time. Inna cuddles! – 2017
- “I don’t want your bucket to be lonely!” This was scribed to me by the lovely Ally herself in the very first ever breakup letter she ever wrote to me, when I went over to her house to pickup her snake Brisk to take care of in August 2015. She said some metaphor about buckets but honestly it’s funnier just to say that she thought we were buckets and didn’t want my bucket to be lonely — babe I don’t want YOUR BUCKET to be lonely OKAY? – 2015 but became a joke in 2018
- “PSD (post traumatic syndrome)” Sorry mom we thought it was pretty funny that you referred to it as this especially because that’s not even the right letter combination for that phrase, and neither of those are accurate for PTSD, so for some reason that stuck and Ally and I don’t make fun of PTSD but sometimes we make light of our post traumatic syndromes (PSD). – 2018
- “You’re my BEST friend.” So as you guys may know, Ally & I are pretty close. She’s like my BEST friend. We’re BEST friends. BEST. FriendsBEST. BESt. Best friends. BEST friends. Best friends. BEST. – 2016
- “7”. 7. 7. 22.214.171.124 Lots of 7. Seven. 7. 714. “714” “7/4” 7 Seven. This is our biggest inside joke. The other day Elana goes “Ok on the count of 3 say the first thing that comes to mind. 1, 2, 3-” and both Ally and I at the same time say “7”. There was no topic either. She just wanted to see if we were similar. We are a little too much. – 2015
- “Sodapressed”. I literally just texted her an hour ago and said “I feel like a beverage cuz I’m soda-pressed” – 2018
9. “Prissy 4-song bitch.” Remember how I spend over full days on my blog posts but Ally can post 4 songs in a day? Good for you Allziez. It was hilarious that I was so jealous that one day and I’m glad you think my insult was hilarious too. Lol – 2018
10. “Driveway Pebbles” tbh you should write a song called that and we should just gas him – 2018
11. “Allziez” it’s a nickname and a life changer. I’m Abbziez and I call you Allziez, my trusted partner in crime. – 2016
12. “Muthafuckaaa!!” Self-explanatory. – 2016-2017?
13. “I love Will” Ally do you even remember this? You said this in our Seattle Adventure video after the NF concert and I was complaining about not being on drugs. Idk who Will is or why you’re so will-ing to love him, but I bet I got a better booty. Jk but you were singing the song-or some version of-Tyler Duren or whatever by Madison Beer – March 18th, 2018 (the day I seriously decided to marry her)
14. “I’ve been dusting a lot today but not with your dad” – Me. Her birth father’s name is Dustin. Sorry Dustin but I make jokes when I clean. – 2018 (why do I think I’m so funny tho)
15. “Ambien Abby” always has something hilarious to say. Lmao or when I start sobbing for no reason and send you videos saying sad stuff! – 2016 to present, this video is from March 2017
16. “Milkshak-ity Shake Shake is Shakin’ It” Ok I call my cat a lot of weird things that Ally witnesses. Get off my back sonny. – Always
17. “MULCH” Remember when we saw that joke on BoJack Horseman about the Mulch and I laughed so hard and then when we were in a rough spot I bought you a bag of mulch with a card that said “I still give a shit about you”? And how you now always say you “love me so mulch?” we’re made for this shit. – 2017
18. “Hey! I’m sorry for not replying I’ve been busy with my family :/” This bitch ignores me for half a week after we stop talking and then says she’s busy with my family. When I ask her about it the following month she laughs and says she’s never even busy with her family wtf LOL So like whenever she doesn’t reply to me it’s chill I’m just like “Oh sorry I know you’re just busy with your family!!!” (; – June 2015, tbh the first inside joke we ever could’ve crafted and the most hilarious to this day.
And now beautiful, let’s get into that super freakin’ adorable photoshoot that we did together. Omg, I woke up and said “Let’s do a photoshoot!” And you said okay without even hesitating and I was S H O O K (Insert the means of shook here ploxnplz) (JK that meant nothing just laugh and move on). You never want to shoot with me! Maybe this was my birthday present omg you were like here I’ll shoot with you but no more birthday presents ever. Eh I’ll agree to yo terms and conditions pretty girl. BY THE WAY ALLY IS MY GIRLFRIEND :)))))))) WAIT HERe’s something cute. Babygirl at the ocean, one of the many places (*cough* my bed) that she belongs.
And now our photoshoot. That was just over a year ago today btw^
- My shirt – Hayley Kiyoko “Window” tee that they sold at her One Bad Night concert in 2017 but I didn’t get it so I ordered it online afterwards
- Ally’s shirt – It’s actually my shirt too BUT it’s Hayley Kiyoko‘s new album “Expectations” cover tee that you can buy with a bundle with the new album! I got it with the CD it’s called the Feelings bundle and that’s what this photoshoot is called. Btw Hayley Kiyoko is like a super famous lesbian artist so obvi we used her for this pretty gayass merch shoot.
- Abby – Lesbian symbol (I’m bi but who cares cuz I’m marrying Ally) belly button ring from BodyCandy, Grey jeans from StitchFix and white platform sneakers from Guess
- Ally – Hollister jeans & black Keds
- I was smoking Marb 27 100s and Ally was smoking Marb Black Menthol 100s
- I drank sugar-free Redbull and Ally had regular Redbull. Match made in heaven.
- Ally: Arrow Boost Color Enhancing Lip Balm
- Both: Lancome Hypnose Drama Mascara, Champagne Pop highlighter by Becca Cosmetics
- Me: Paula Dorf bronzer in Bora Bora, Hikari Shimmer Bronzer in Flush, Kaplan MD Lip 20 Mask & Lip Balm and Adessa Cupucau Butter Lip Balm (etc)
This was such a fun freaking shoot wtf. Life is never this fun. Well all in all, I love you Ally. I love you with all of me, with all of my being. I know we’ve had a lot of rough days and scary times, but honestly my brain and my heart dwell on how much they love and need you a lot more than they fear any of that stuff. Being with you makes me afraid of nothing, except the idea of losing you completely. I feel like being with you is like having on a suit of armor because no matter what I do I can always come crying to you with the mess or the booboo and all you wanna do is help me. And love me. And hold me. And speak my language. The way we talk is like we’re writing an encrypted book. The way we act is like two crazy teenagers in love, but hey now we’re two crazy teenage adults in love. I can’t wait to show the whole world, my whole world too, and have you help me build our own customized one with little touches here and there from the both of us. Nothing in the world could feel more like home, my love. I can’t wait to marry you. I can’t wait to live with you. I don’t care how stupid we become or how petty we act, we always snap ourselves out of it. I’ll never be able to show you how much it means to me that you’re now truly standing up for me in front of your friends, because before you definitely went with them with a lot of things. But now I think you know me and you know yourself better and you’re not gonna let them fw us. Or at least now they know that if they fw me then they’re fw you. No more wondering why. No more nights where you feel alone baby because the more I’m with you, the more I want to KNOW you, and love you, so I can hold you from a-fucking-far. Let’s slay this world together, one bullseye at a time. Thank you for staying around til your 18th birthday babygirl, thank you for living when it’s hard, thank you for breathing when the only reason you can think of is for me. I wanna live to give you more reasons to live. So here’s to # 18.
Here’s the old video I made of Ally & I in Dec 2016. Still relevantly cute.
you make me better, now I smile all the time.
lil baby just made this video a few seconds ago and sent it to me. goodnight y’all!